The Speck in Her Eye.-Episode 3

The Speck In Her Eye (Part 3)

I felt insulted, Haba! Love no be offence now (It’s not a crime to like someone). I decided to let her be but I couldn’t…I liked what I saw and I was willing to give it another shot. I opened up to Elder Sam and told him how the girl shot me down when I tried to be friendly.

“That’s strange…I’ve never heard any derogatory remarks about Funmi, she is a good girl and a genuine child of God. Let me look into this before you approach her again” he told me.

I decided to let Elder Sam handle it…about 2 weeks after our discussion, he asked me to see him at home. When I got there he told me he had discussed with Pastor Fred who confirmed that although Funmi was not in any relationship, she had trust issues when it came to men and relationships, however, God was already helping her deal with this.

Elder Sam said he put in a good word for me and Pastor Fred promised to talk to Funmi and hopefully she would lower the defenses a little. I thanked him for vouching for me and left his house.

The next time I saw Funmi, she was more receptive…she smiled and listened to what I had to say. I told her I just wanted to be her friend and get to know her

“Why do you want to be my friend and what is your definition of a friend?” She asked

I was taken aback because I had never had anyone ask me such a question. I tried to explain but even I wasn’t satisfied with my answer…it was on my way home that I started to think of better ways I could have answered the question.

Funmi agreed that we could hang out and talk, she said she wouldn’t give me her number yet as I had to earn it. We agreed to meet at the church for our first date and go anywhere we wanted from there.

I was happy she at least agreed to go out with me; the ball was now in my court, to show her the real me and make something meaningful out of the opportunity.
The first date was very “interesting”; I got to know that she had never dated any guy before. However, her questions were filled with so much wisdom. Questions that would make any man ‘confess’ his intentions without planning to. That was the day I got to know that she was an only child, an orphan and was raised by Pastor Fred from age 15. She didn’t give details of how she ended up with the Pastor. I also shared a little about myself and what it was like growing up.

Uncle Sam couldn’t wait to find out how it went…I remember telling him

“That girl is something else sir. She is truly Pastor Fred’s daughter. Everything had to be tackled from a spiritual point of view. She even asked us to pray after I dropped her off at the church.

I like her sha. If there’s anything my mother taught me to look for in a woman, it’s her prayer gauge and I think I just found a girl with full tank”

The next time I saw Funmi, she gave me her number and that was how our friendship started. She was so easy to talk to and was always giving wonderful advice. She was seasoned spiritually and I liked that about her…I knew that was an awesome selling point if she met my mum.

However, I noticed that apart from the spiritual stuff, Funmi was a little unforthcoming…she could talk for hours if we were discussing a sermon that the pastor preached or a book that one of us read but when it came to some other things that I wanted to talk about, she would just go quiet. I told Elder Sam but he encouraged me to give her time and to keep working on building the friendship.

Before I could get Funmi to come to my house, it must have been almost 6 months after we started talking. I was seriously ill and couldn’t go to work and she told me she made an exception because of my illness.

I wanted a clearly defined relationship and I decided to have a talk with Funmi to know what was happening or where we were headed. She asked me what God had told me about our friendship as that was more important than any definition we gave it.

“Why must everything be spiritual? You have known me for a while now…can’t you tell already, that I am serious and I want the relationship to move forward?” I retorted

“It’s not just about feelings; you don’t even know me as much as you think you do. What has God told you about me?

I am very sorry but I believe that the Spiritual controls the Physical and that is why I’m more concerned with what God told you, regardless of how good you think this is going” she responded.

With her answer, I felt like I had been wasting my time with her…how could she not know where we were headed after almost 7 months of what I considered serious dating? There were other girls in the church, even in my group, that would jump at the opportunity. Right there, I decided I would tell Elder Sam that I was done and would look elsewhere.

“It’s true we enjoy each other’s company and have lots of fun but there is more to it than that. Mutual attraction is great but beyond all that, a relationship that is going somewhere should have heaven’s approval. There may be other girls that will jump at the prospects but I’m sorry, I’m just not like that” Funmi continued, as if she heard what I was thinking…it was kind of scary

“Niran, it’s not like I’m asking for the head of John the Baptist…I’m just saying you should pray about this and hear from God before you commit to this” she added.

Her last statement made me rethink my earlier decision…and I decided to seek God’s face.

I started to pray and Elder Sam promised to pray along with me; I even fasted…it was a simple prayer

I prayed for direction

I prayed for illumination

I prayed for revelation

I prayed that God’s will be done in my life

Not long after I started to pray, I had a dream…

©Lanre Olagbaju

Story continues in part 4

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